A Change of Scenery:
Seeking Change After a Loved One Dies
The death of a loved is one of the most jarring of personal tragedies you can experience. One day, an important source of love and emotional support is suddenly gone forever. You feel lost, not knowing where to turn or what to do next. Coping with such emotional devastation causes some people to seek a change of scenery and start a new life, hoping it will provide a buffer between them and the terrible pain they’re feeling.
Don’t Feel Guilty
There’s no need to feel guilty about seeking a change of scenery. You have to get on with your life and starting over somewhere else may be easier from an emotional standpoint. If you do decide to move after losing a loved one, be aware that you’ll be dealing with two highly stressful situations. Exercise, meditation, and deep-breathing exercises can help you cope with the tremendous pressure you’ll face during this difficult time.
Listen carefully to your REALTOR®️. Estate executors sometimes over-inflate the value of a loved one’s home, even if it’s clearly been neglected, with peeling paint, leaky gutters, and termite damage clearly visible. Your REALTOR®️ can tell you exactly what needs to be done to prepare a house for sale to get its full value. You can save time by hiring a professional service to give your place a deep cleaning before you move out.
It can be confusing having to decide where to move, especially if all you really know is that you want to go somewhere else. With your REALTOR’S®️ help, begin looking for neighborhoods in which you’d like to live based on criteria that matters to you (i.e near a park, close to amenities, etc.).
Making a new start means decluttering and getting rid of old belongings. That can be a gut-wrenching experience because you’re throwing out or giving away some of the last tangible connections to your departed loved one. Try seeing it as an essential step in downsizing and achieving a simpler life. Keep only those objects that stir happy memories and strong emotions, items you want to include in your new house. Beware turning your home into a shrine, which isn’t a healthy way to cope with the loss, so try to avoid hanging onto things simply because they once belonged to your loved one.
If necessary, ask a friend or relative to help you make tough decisions and work through this difficult task. Give friends and family members the opportunity to ease their grief by taking any belongings you’re throwing out or donating.
What you do plan to keep should be kept organized in the packing process. Box up like items and label everything carefully so you know exactly what should go where when you arrive in your new space.
There are plenty of moving companies to choose from, so be sure to compare carefully and find one that suits your needs and budget (you can expect to pay around $25 per hour per mover on average). Get quotes from three to four movers and do some research online. Read customer reviews and look into their business ratings before contracting with a company. Moving everything you own is a stressful experience, so plan ahead and try to schedule it when movers aren’t so busy (avoid moving on weekends, traditionally a very busy time for movers). The more you can plan ahead, the less stressful it will be.
The grieving process can take a long time, but it’s an important catharsis that helps us come to terms with a truly jarring life event. Sometimes, distance can make that transition a bit easier, which is why people who have experienced loss sometimes feel the need for a change of scenery.
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